I understand your frustration, hair loss in women can be more stressful then men hair loss and can have bad psychological effect.
Dandruff does not cause serious hair loss, but it can increase hair fall by a significant amount.
You can treat dandruff by using Selsun blue with head & shoulders.
As for the hair loss, there are many causes and many solutions, first thing you need to do is to visit a good dermatologist in your area to detect the problem.
investigated with appropriate physical examination and laboratory tests until a diagnosis is confirmed. No treatment of hair loss should be undertaken until a diagnosis is made.Click here to find a Dermatologist
Many times the main cause is related to hormones (pregnancy, thyroid, ect..) or hypothyroidism and need to treated as part of overall effective treatment.
It can also be Androgenetic alopecia (a recurrent disease of unknown cause that results in patchy loss of hair from the scalp and/or eyebrows) or Alopecia areata (pattern hair loss with a typical pattern of diffuse hair thinning over the central scalp), in such cases a combination of Minoxidil and hair restoration can help.
Here is some more information for you to read:http://www.forhair.com/women_female_hair_loss.htmhttp://www.hairlosspress.com/111/women-hair-loss/post7114.html#p7114http://www.hairlosspress.com/567/women- ... ransplant/